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  • Name : Hilda and Nooshzad
  • City/Country : United States
  • Birthday : Mar 20, 1996
  • Gender : Female
  • Profile Views : 60696
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of stories : 28

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helllllooo, ha var yoooo?

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Emrooz I bought a package of hot wax. I laughed when I read "Results last up to 4 weeks". MLIP

#6428
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The movers just came to our house, but instead of coming at 3 p.m. as scheduled they came at 6 p.m. My dad usually says "Shab Bekhayr" as a sort of insult to a person that is late. The movers arrive, he walks up to them and says "Good Night". The movers look at him like "What?!?!" MLIP

 

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Today, I had left my birth control pills on my desk. My grandpa walks in my room, sees the picture on the cover, and goes "YAA KHODA!". I'm only on birth control for acne reasons, but now my grandpa think i'm a jendeh. MLIP.

#5240
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (187) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (13)

Feb 27, 2010 11:52 PM - Health - by prsn (Female)

 

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I may only go to the dentist every three years, put off getting my eyes checked, and skip my doctor checkups, but I always always make it to get my eyebrows banded every two weeks, NO MATTER WHAT. MLIP.

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Today, I sent my sister a funny MLIP post via AIM. She called my mom and told her, and then said that my mom says "mageh to dars nadari?" I told her that was hilarious and that I was going to put it on this website. She relayed another message from my mom, this time it said "pedarsag ageh bezari too internet cheshato dar miaram". MLIP.

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Today, I told my parents that I wanted to get married to a rich Persian guy so I could drop out of school. They thought it was the greatest thing they had ever heard. MLIP.

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Today, me and my cousin bought sundresses from Aeropostale. They were up to our knees and the straps were not showy (or "sexy mexy") at all, but knowing our parents, we even put a tank top underneath. When we wore them and went downstairs to show our parents, the first thing the said was, "Very cute...but very lokht bodo bodo yeh tee eshirt zeeresh bepoosh bah jean, khayley sexy mexy shood." MLIP.

 

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Whenever I turn on too many lights in the house my mom comes and asks, "Aroosie nanate?" MLIP

#3378
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (714) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (41)

Feb 10, 2010 11:46 PM - Love - by Topoloo (Female)

 

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when i was in elementary school and i would ask my dad for help on my homework, it would end with my dad making me cry. MLIP

#1930
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (1336) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (79)

Feb 3, 2010 10:09 PM - Kids - by Anonymous (Male)

 

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Today My Momon-bazorg made my favorite meal: Zereshk polo. When she asked me how it was, my mouth was full so i responded with a thumbs up. She wasnt happy. MLIP

 

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Pari rooz, my sefeed friends came over and tried tadeeg and of couse, they loved it! Today at madreseh they asked me where to buy some. ohhhh, silly sefeeds. MLIP

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Today at work, a persian woman asked me if there were any persian associates available to help her. I said I'm half persian. She looks back at me, distraught, and says "Why only half???" MLIP!!

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Today we went to get some donuts. I wanted the one with sprinkles on it, my mom asked the guy,"Could we have the ones with sparkles on it." MLIP

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I still remember the day this new Persian kid rode the bus in elemenetary school for the first time: his mother came up to the bus door and said "bye mommy!" Then the chini boy sitting across from me said to himself " why did SHE call HIM mommy?" mlip.

#4447
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today my dad said "let's go see king of prussia." umm. dad? it's prince of persia. haha mlip. :]

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You know your Persian when someone brings up the movie "300" and you immediatly start ranting about how that movie was all made up and falsely portrayed Persians. MLIP

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Today my nine-years-old sister went to my dad to ask him a simple question on her science. thirty minutes later she came back crying, throwing her science book to the wall....MLIveryP.

#9543
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (163) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (3)

Jul 6, 2010 09:50 PM - Kids - by Hatty (Male)

 

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After a lengthy conversation about rappers, specifically Eminem, my mother chimes in, "I really like them, especially the ones with peanuts in them" MLIP.

#13418
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (84) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (5)

Mar 15, 2011 06:29 PM - Food - by pv (Male)

 

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I love how Iranians clap after every song at a party! MLIP

#14298
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In 4th grade, I had a crush on an Asian girl named Annie Goh. I showed her picture to my mom in the yearbook, and she said "khak to saret! eenam shod esm?!" As if it was my fault that her name translates to "Crappy Crap." MLIP.

#4075
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (438) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (13)

Feb 17, 2010 03:12 PM - Love - by jaybird (Male)

 

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Emrooz, I realized that whenever I see a watermelon, I have an urge to slap it. MLIP

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Today, I got a flyer advertising the new persian restaurant and its lunch time "especial". On the back, they say they are a 5 star restaurant, and go on to list 5 reasons why, with a tiny star next to each one. MLIP

#14288
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (87) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (4)

May 30, 2011 10:09 AM - Food - by f (Female)

 

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On the morning train, the Persian man next to me pulls out an anar (pomegranate).MLIP

#14253
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You can hear my baba's sneeze from across the house. MLIP

#5758
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (1356) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (51)

Mar 10, 2010 05:23 PM - Love - by parisarah (Female)

 

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My little niece was at our house for dinner and noticed that her grandpa loves eating sabzi with meals. She had no idea what it was. The next day at school, she told her teacher "my grandpa eats grass!!!" MLIP

#14252
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Every time i find something funny on this website i call my dad and make him read it, but before he reads it he says "Is about a Persian in a supermarket slapping some vatermelons?" haha oh well, once you go Persian, there is no other version (; MLIP

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I am truly an expert on the different kinds, shapes, and size of noses. MLIP

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I found out that it's ok for persian guys not to be virgins, but we'll be called jendehs. MLIP.

#5746
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Up until today, I thought that slapping watermelons in the grocery store to see if they're good was something that everybody did. MLIP

#4442
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Whenever i get fast food my mom always says "in ashghala chieh mikhori" and then eats some of my food MLIP

#14062
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Me: Baba im bored
Baba: Vhy dont u hang out vif dat friend of yours? u kno "book"
Me: You mean paige?
Baba:Ya!! book, paige, same ting.

#12859
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Everytime I go to restaurant with persians, World War III gets started over who pays the bill.

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Today I got accepted to Harvard. My mom told my grandmother the news and she replied, "I'm sorry, but it's okay he can still go to community college and transfer to UCLA." MLIP

#67
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Today, I went babysitting for this persian lady. When she came home she saw I was on my phone and asked me how much my "Be-LUEberry" cost me. MLIP

#13791
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today i walked in my mom's room and said "momon i love you!" she immediately replied "cheeyeh? Pool meekhay?" MLIP

#13690
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Whenever I watch a SLIGHTLY inappropriate show, I always have a "back-up" channel incase my parents walk in. MLIP

#5094
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Our mom was reading her recent receipt to us from the Supermarket, where she bragged about how she saved $6500 in 6 months by clipping coupons. MLIP.

#13597
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My mother always threatened , "Eef you effer stay out late again, I vill sent you to Iran! Goosh meekonee? Meefresamet!" I thought she was kidding. Until now, that I'm in the airport, waiting for a flight to Amsterdam to connect to Tehran that then connects to Shiraz so I can live with my grandmother. She really wasn't joking. I'm a incredibly sad, but hey, at least there's ghormeh sabzi. MLIP

#13226
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Me: "Maman! Maman! Maman! MAMAN!!"
Maman: "MAMAN OH MARAZ OH KOOFETH ZAHREMAR! MAMAN MORD!!"
MLIP

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My sister and I have a "you shave my back, I'll shave yours" relationship. MLIP

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Today class my math teacher wrote cos, shorthand for cosine, and I laughed. MLIP

#4766
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today, i was babysitting a sefeed kid and I decided to take her to my persian friends house. the kid jumped on my friends beds with her SHOES on..........all 3 of us persian friends twiched and died inside a little.......MLIP

#4261
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My mom and dad make me and my sister call all their friends " Amoo for guy" or "Khaleh for girls". MLIP

#563
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The other day I went to dinner with my parents and some of their friends. When the bill came all the men reached to grab it. My dad reached accross the table grabbed the bill and ran to the bathroom so he could pay lol. MLIP

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My father's name is Mehrzad, however he introduces himself to all of my sefeed friends as "Peter". There is absolutely no correlation between the two. MLIP

#131
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (1414) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (119)

Jan 20, 2010 08:33 PM - Money - by Ghod's Son (Male)

 

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Today, just out of curiosity i decided to ask my sister who invented books. After deeply considering her options, she replied with, "Iranians." MLIP

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I think it is very rude when you start taroffing something (just because your Persian) and people take something, the worst part is they take all your food and you have nothing. So sometimes 'ghalat bokonam tarof konam. MLIP

#14022
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The other day, I got my report card back. I got stragiht a's and 4 b's. The next day, I realised my door has changed and my computer is gone. My parents put a lock on the outside of the door to lock me in... now a days my parents lock me in my room and force me to study. MLIP

#14403
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During my Spanish class(which is mainly persian) we had a substitute. All the persians killed her by speaking in persian during the roll (Ex- Antony Hakimi? MAN INJUS HASDAM! What does that mean? ) We spent the whole 2 days with her making up polite words, such as gooz meaning hello :) Idk, i think MLIP

#13920
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Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when my mom sent me a text saying "i am vatching you ;)". Instinctivly, I turned around to see a bunch of 45 year-old women wearing black from head to toe with fake blonde hair and dark eyebrows, gigling and pointing at me. MY MOM SENT PERSIAN SPIES AFTER ME! what has the world come to? MLIP

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Emrooz, me and my little sister were at the mall and she wanted me to look at a toy, so to get my attention she started yelling "nigaah! Nigaah!" right infront of a black person -___- MLIP

#13275
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (78) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (7)

Mar 14, 2011 01:23 PM - Kids - by amir (Female)

 

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Emrooz, I went to dinner with my family at a greek restaurant. IN the middle of our meal, we noticed that there was another persian family sitting near us. A few minutes later they started to bring a cake to them and they were singing tavalodat mobarak to them. My madar bozorg got up and started to sing. MLIP

 

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Today, me and my dad were watching Dr.Phil. He was talking about how daughters need love and hugs and kisses from there dad, because if they dont get that attention from there Father, they go seek it from other guys and relationships and usually dont get it. Well my dad was like "Vayyyyyy, Beeyah eenja dokhtaram, Dr. Phil goft hug-ged koonam... man pedaree khoobee hastam!" LOL MLIP

#12835
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (136) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (9)

Feb 11, 2011 05:15 PM - Kids - by Sheilz (Female)

 

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Today I asked my aunt when I could get my eyebrows done and she said "Gerade 12" I asked my mom and she said "arooset" when I asked my dad he replied "vaghti man mordam!!!!" MLIP

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I love how there's an entire category dedicated to 'hair' on mlip. Sort of makes you feel like a bear. MLIP

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Today, in World History class, we were watching 300 to learn about the ancient Spartans. All of the persians began coughing and shifting uncomfortably in their seats. It was really akward. MLIP

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Growing up, how many of you were threatened by your parents that they would cut the TV cord?

#7641
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Today, when I was going out I told my maman "I love you!"
Her response: "ghalat kardi, hamin alan behet pool dadam." MLIP

#13692
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Today while waiting in line with hundreds of people at the Apple Store to get the iPad 2 before their doors opened me and my friend played Takhteh for 5 hours.

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Today I'm reading through all these messages and most are of Persian girls dating non-Persian guys. I think to myself "typical Persian girls hating on Persian guys" MLIP

#14299
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (152) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (23)

Jun 1, 2011 01:08 PM - Love - by Pesar (Male)

 

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Today me and my dad went to Popeye's. When the employee asked for my dad's I.D., my dad starting yelling,cursing in farsi and american, and asked to see the manager because he thought the employee was implying that he was a terrorist. :P MLIP

 

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I told my mom that i have a girl friend and that her name was Mikhaela (as a joke). The next day she came to my class and yelled "WHICH ONE IS IT!" MLIP.

#12114
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Today, my dad started besh-ganding (the really loud persain snap type thing or whatever the hell it is) to the song Tik Tok by Kesha in the car. MLIP

#327
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Every time my maman gets angry at me, she yells at me in Gilaki, even though she knows I can't understand. MLIP

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Today i had my white friend over to my house, she heard my dad shouting down the phone in persian and asked if everything was okay, i laughed and explained to her that in Iran we don't talk, we shout. MLIP.

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Today I was cleaning my room and I found my old Farsi School Homework. MLIP.

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Today I asked my mom the number of the waxing lady. She told me to look in her phone book under wax. I repeatedly went through all the "W's" and still couldn't find it. When I asked her again she vigorously said "its in my phone book under "V" for Vax" MLIP

#3249
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Today, my mammabozorg told me I was getting too thin. She then shoveled rice, tahdig and khoreshteh bademjoon on my plate. Then, my mom told me I was too fat and took my plate away. MLIP.

#160
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (1076) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (99)

Jan 21, 2010 01:32 AM - Food - by !!! (Female)

 

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My parents think playing basketball will make you taller. MLIP

#3530
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Today my parents watched an English movie, turned on the subtitles, and pressed "pause" on every line of dialogue. It took them 30 minutes to read and understand the first 5 minutes of the movie. MLIP.

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Today my dad started slapping watermelons to see if they were good enough infront of the whole supermarket. MLIP

#4265
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Today I made the mistake of saying "ahh, I don't feel like going to school on monday". My mom instantly thought I was going to drop out and gave me a 20 minute lecture which consisted of : "azizam, madresseh ayandato missaze... cinema raftan, tafriyat va youteyoube hich kari basseh ayandat nemiconan"...blablabla "tafriyat hamisheh hastesh, television jayee nemireh" . MLIP

#2761
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Today, I open my house door and see at least 30 pairs of shoes sitting on the floor. I walk into the living room and see my mom and all her friends. As they all get up, I whisper "FML" under my breath, and continue on my way to get kissed on the cheek by 30 women.
MLIF

#6341
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Today I was explaining to my dad that you say "thank god" and not "thanks god" he then proceeded to say "what if i want to thank him more than once?" and looked at me like i was an idiot. MLIP

#5497
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Today while walking by the store Banana Republic at the mall, i see some persian people stare at us as my mom yells "Lets go too de mooz republic of store" MLIP

 

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Atal matal tootooleh. Gov-eh Hassan chejooreh? Na sheer dareh Na pestoon. Sheeresha bordan hendesun. Yek Zaneh kordee besooon. Esmesha bezar angazi. Doreh kolash ghermezee. Acheen o vacheen. Yeh paht o var cheen!
-If u dont remember this game, you are not persian! MLIP :):)

#12831
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The top three most important days of a persian girls life: 1) the day she gets laser hair removal, 2) the day she gets a nose job, and 3) the day she becomes a doctor. MLIP

 

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my dad thinks that iranians made hulu.com

#4624
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Emrooz, Babam called me five times while I was setting up a board meeting at work. I thought it was an emergency since he called so many times. I called him back and said, "Baba chi shodeh? Are you okay?" and he goes, "Areh. I'm fine." So I asked him why he called me five times in a row and he goes, "Areh, bebinam-Harry Potter chiyeh?" MLIP.

 

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today, i saw this persian girl when i was out. i knew everything about her and her family even though we've never met. MLIP.

#2975
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When I was younger, I used to get a little embarrassed when my parents would speak Farsi to me around safeds because they would give weird looks. But now, not only do I appreciate my culture so much more, but speaking Farsi is the greatest tool when trying to have a private conversation around safeds... or to talk about them. MLIP.

#6144
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Everytime I am on the phone with a Persian family member, I find myself repeating "Baleh, baleh, Merci, Kheily Mamnoon, Baleh, Baleh, Merci, Shoma hameentor" about six times. MLIP.

#1883
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I recently told my Persian boyfriend that I am not a virgin and he was quiet upset. It's okay that he has had 10+ sexual partners but not okay that I have had only 2. Gotta love the double standard.

#4810
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Today, my dad was reading something. He still uses the middle finger to point after being here for 30 years. MLIP

#1956
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Whenever my parents see someone who looks persian on television, they pronounce the last name to somehow try and make it sound like the person's from iran. MLIP

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Today, my uncle sent a picture of my two year old cousin. She has a unibrow.

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Today I overheard at the Persian Store, "Vell, I said to him, 'Eskeroo you!'" MLIP

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Every time my dad see's a squirrel, he yells in his heavy ass Persian accent, "escrew escrew".When I go to correct him he says, "to nemidooni, saket bash"......MLIP

#11383
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when one of my dads friends calls him in public its like no ones around, he yells on top of his lungs " HALO JOONAM HOW VAR YOU" then when he laughs its not like "hahaha" its more like "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA" ... MLIP

#12529
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Today my mother was talking about my american boyfriend....she kept calling him a she! MLIP

 

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Today, my Persian boyfriend and I went to get our eyebrows done. MLIP

#2394
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When that episode of "My Super Sweet Sixteen" featured a Persian girl and her family, I stayed glued to the TV as I tried to pick out snippets of Farsi and every Persian thing she and her family did. MLIP

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In high school, I was the only 4.0 student serving detention every week...for being excessively late to class. MLIP.

#4784
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After complaining about having a bad internet connection, our dad decided to call the cable company himself because he said, "Shomaahaa balad nistin baahaashoon sobat konim." When the customer service rep picks up my dad says, "Hello Esteve, my daughters are chewing on me because antarnet does not vork." My sister and I had to go to our rooms because we were laughing too hard from that. MLIP

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Every time I catch a cold, my grandmother will lecture me that the reason I got sick was because I am always lokht. MLIP

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It's funny when you get happy there is another persian in your class and have the urge to be friends with them MLIP

#2333
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last night we went out to a restaurant with another irooni family and right after dessert while we were taarofing over paying my dad suddenly got up to go to the bathroom... when we asked for the bill our waiter told us that my dad had already paid him when he sneaked off! MLIP

#10720
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I seriously believe that Persians eat more rice that Chinese people. MLIP

#6165
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Areh! Your Life Is Persian (771) - Na Baba! Your Life Is Not Persian (19)

Mar 14, 2010 02:30 PM - Food - by anita (Female)

 

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Emrooz, my mom and her friends are having a party. They just spent half an hour trying to figure out how to take a picture with a laptop that doesn't have a camera. They then brewed tea and spent the next half hour discussing how technology has gotten too advanced nowadays. MLIP

 

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Today, I realized that the dog my dad wouldn't let us bring in the house has now become king of the castle. He eats kabob on the regular and gets called "azizam" while i get called "dokhtaram". MLIP.

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My dad seems to always point at things with his middle finger. MLIP

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My mom enjoys discussing my life with her sisters. MLIP.

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Today maman peeled many delicious fruits for my brother and when I asked her for some, she just said: "khodet boro bokhor, you have grown up now. Other girls have shohar and bacheh, but you're still ..." MLIP

#14571
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My dad greets most his phone calls with, "Salaam Azizam, Azizam salaam, dooset daram, asheghetam, va salaam." MLIP.

#14671
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When I hear my parents talking to my family in Iran on the phone and then say "Naseem?! Baleh, Baleh, eenjast! Gooshi.." I quickly run to my room and pretend to be sleeping.

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My parents always manage to walk in during the worst scene of a show or movie and I get yelled at for watching "een ashghal". MLIP.

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